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Unfortunately, this
is the part no one warns you about. Yes,
you're
probably tired of spending 24/7 at your
doctor's office, but being
done with the 'active fighting' can be a
pretty scary thing. It's very
common for survivors to feel this way -
relieved, but anxious, worried, stressed
and even depressed. You probably have a
million questions... (check out our guide
below) You're still fighting exhaustion,
chemo brain and bone pain - and trying to
figure out how to make the 3 eyelashes you
have left look full and voluminous. You
may be worried about the side effects of
medication you'll be taking for the next
five years, and you're dealing with issues
unique to young survivors, such as fertility
and dating. It doesn't help that everyone
you know is calling to say, "aren't
you glad it's all over?" You may even
begin to question yourself, "should
I be glad it's all over? It doesn't feel
over." That's because it's not over,
and what you're feeling is part of the emotional
journey that, for many, doesn't begin until
the end of active treatment. |
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Fortunately, there are
some things you can do to make getting though
this a little
easier. Try to find a trusted friend or
loved one and ask them to simply listen,
then share your thoughts. (It's okay to
ask your confidante to refrain from responding
with, "just think positive and it will
all be ok." Although it is almost always
said out
of love and concern, assure them that as
a good listener, they are supporting you
in a very tangible way.) Your feelings are
valid, and talking about them will help
you move forward. Your concerns, fears and
worries are a part of the emotional journey
you're on, and allowing yourself to experience
the emotions is an important part of healing.
To keep from becoming overwhelmed, try to
take things day by day, ask for help if
you need it, and don't be afraid to pull
the cancer card - you've earned it. It may
take some time, but you will start to feel
better as you begin to adjust to your 'new
normal'. Be sure to talk to your doctor
about any emotional problems you're experiencing,
including anxiety, depression or trouble
sleeping.
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We're
not implying that it's a cure-all,
but we've found The List to be a great
tool in getting through some bad days.
Here's the deal: get out a pen, a
big sheet of paper (or print out our
List) and set aside little bit of
'me' time. Write down all of the things
you've always wanted to do, or dreamed
of doing 'one day'. Include big things,
like trips or running a marathon,
and small things, like curling up
on a rainy day and reading a book
from cover to cover or learning to
dance. Next, spend some time thinking
about things that make you feel good.
They can be simple things, like watching
the sunset, indulging in a pint of
your favorite ice cream, getting a
pedicure with your daughter, shopping
with a friend, taking a nap, splurging
on a Venti Latte... The point is to
write down as many things as possible
that make you happy and bring you
joy. Keep your List handy, and when
you're having a bad day, try to do
something on The List. That way, even
at the end of your worst day, you
can say to yourself, "I lived
a little today - at least I did ___________."
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Exercise can be fun,
and several recent studies have suggested
that staying active can help lower the
risk of recurrence. Instead of going to
the gym and running on a treadmill, try
something different, like a salsa
class! There are so many ways to get
active - pilates, yoga, swimming, dancing...
Find something that you enjoy and it'll
be much easier to stick to an exercise
plan. Remember to talk to your doctor
before beginning a new exercise program.
Good nutrition can help you feel better
right now - and help reduce the chance
of recurrence. Talk to your doctor about
any special dietary needs you may have,
and find out if he can recommend a nutritionist.
Want more information and tips for healthy
eating? Check out these informative websites
for some great dietary guidelines and
nutrition tips. American
Cancer Society, American
Institute for Cancer Research.
It's the sorority
nobody wants to join, but now that you're
in, you might be surprised at how much
fun you and your sorority sisters can
have together. It's amazing how the big-C
creates instant friendships - and spending
time with friends who 'get' what you've
been through can be incredibly healing.
Pink Heals Survivor Events don't actually
focus on cancer...we think that getting
out and participating in something new
and fun is a great way to move forward,
and being surrounded by women who have
been in your heels is very therapeutic.
We're always doing something different,
and hope you'll join us at our next Survivor
Event. As one of the survivors at a recent
event said, "I'm
so glad I came, because tonight wasn't
about cancer... It was about life!"
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